My wife and I recently celebrated our wedding anniversary. We spent the weekend in Lake Geneva, a tourist destination in Wisconsin that attracts thousands of people on weekends. Octoberfest was occurring and the downtown was hopping.
While walking to dinner we encountered two young couples. As they approached, one of the women asked “When is your anniversary?”
We didn’t know this person or how she knew it was our anniversary, so we hesitated. She sensed our caution and then re-phrased the question to “How long have you been married?” I replied that we’d been married 45 years.
Both couples were flabbergasted (I think because we’ve been married almost twice as long as they have been alive). The woman who posed the question practically bowed to us. She then asked me for the secret to our relationship.
I could see that the young men were less enthused by this conversation – so I decided to add some humor and replied: “Husbands are always right.” That got the attention of the men, the fist bumping occurred and they became more interested.
My wife held her tongue and let me have my moment (God bless her). The woman, however, wasn’t buying it so she asked her and got this reply “Be humble. I put him first and he puts me first and then it’s all good.” The woman was very impressed with the secret and gave me one more chance. I provided the advice my brother-in-law gave me on our wedding night: “Never go to bed angry with each other.”
The conversation ended and they thanked us profusely. Their amazement and respect were heartwarming and one man commented that we don’t look old enough to be married 45 years. That was great to hear, even if it isn’t true. The woman congratulated us and stated that they would keep us in their prayers.
As my wife and I debriefed, we realized that we forgot to tell them the most important advice: Invite God into your relationship. You will surely need Him to get through the life challenges you will encounter.
As we thought further, we came up with these other tidbits:
- When times get tough, stay together and support each other;
- Remain best friends. Other friends will come and go for various reasons;
- Find a hobby or interest that you can do together;
- Be positive, gracious, and generous to others;
- If you are lucky enough to have children, do your best to equip them with faith, hope, charity, respect for others, perseverance, good character, the value of work, and good humor.
What advice would you give to younger people thinking of marriage?